1. |
Zip Code
02:52
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Calumet avenue.
Those six syllables mean nothing to you
Esoteric as a zip code
Indy’s way closer than Kennedy
Even though their distance is a dozen trees
Esoteric as a zip code
Clowning around at the city fair
while we’re laughing at our Mayor’s stare
Esoteric as a zip code
If only everybody lived on my block
But I’d rather live alone under my rock
So I guess you’ll never see
Why it’s special to me
Anderson’s safer than Tanglewood
They’re apartment complexes in case you misunderstood
Esoteric as a zip code
Petros has the best food in this world
But I’m sure you’ll say the same of Jason’s Bar & Grill
Esoteric as a zip code
If only everybody lived on my block
But I’d rather live alone under my rock
So I guess you’ll never see
Why it’s special to me
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2. |
Man About Town
02:34
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Man about town ,
Which diner has an early bird deal?
How come you’re always around there just to eat that same old meal?
Man about town, there’s a Shake Shack off Ashland Ave!
Aren’t you bored with covering that 12 dollar 7 cent tab?
Don’t hand me a passport I’m 219 bound
I have no problem confessing I’m a man about town
Man about town,
Ain’t it time to go home?
As long as it’s city limits, everywhere’s like my own
Man about town,
All your friends left, you must feel so alone
It’s all memories for now while I’m stuck here on dial tone
Don’t hand me a passport I’m 219 bound
I have no problem confessing I’m a man about town
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3. |
Tapper Troubadour
05:32
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As I rave about street-light lore
You all call it a bore
potholed alleys to quaint bonfires
I’m your local small town cryer
I’m your tapper troubadour
Hear me strumming by your door
Which local tidbits shall I rhyme this time?
Where the city meets the town
Brown yuppies and hobo clowns
Blue collar to the core
But at night, a topless whore
Everybody’s says it’s past its prime
I’m your tapper troubadour
Hear me strumming by your door
Which local tidbits shall I rhyme this time?
Hammond, the urban
Hammond, the suburban
Where Illinois plates are the only crime
I’m your tapper troubadour
Hear me strumming by your door
Which local tidbits shall I rhyme this time?
Follow me for a tour
From detours to the shore
I assure you’ll have the best of times
I’m your tapper troubadour
Hear me strumming by your door
Which local tidbits shall I rhyme this time?
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4. |
In The Event
02:37
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In the event,
in the event that I go out
I promise not to make enemies
I will not shout
In the event,
in the event, that I stay in
At least the chances are slim
that I will sin
But In the event,
in the event, that I drive around
I can window shop around my town
At least, my wallet will still weigh a quarter pound
I will see,
I will see what keeps them busy
But I must admit all their progress makes me dizzy
In the event,
in the event, that I still live here
But, I know I will, and always will
I hope I made that clear
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5. |
I'd Rather Stay Home
04:08
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Wanna watch my kid’s little league from the bleachers?
How about the beach? It’s that time of year.
I’d hate to admit, I’d rather answer with neither.
Thank you very much, but I’d rather stay home
How about dancing after hours at the club?
Or playing beer pong, then trying to chug?
Sorry but I’d rather stay here sipping tea out a mug
Thank you very much, but I’d rather stay home
How about that inaugural Zombie marathon walk?
Or let’s go see that Disney movie with the genie that talks?
Sorry but I’d rather weep, sleep, and rot
Thank you very much, but I’d rather stay home
They’re going on vacations eight hundred forty miles away
Though here I am twiddling thumbs till I catch a strain of grey
Thank you very much, but I’d rather stay home
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6. |
Hessville Hug Hexagon
02:13
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I was strutting down towards Kennedy
Looking for that three floor gallery
I used to frequent here
At least once a year
Now it’s one big space for some Dada doll
She’ll chug red wine through all six halls
Is her birthday 10/31?
Or is she putting on a front?
Prolific for some GenX region rat
With art lined up on two dozen racks
One day, she’s in LA
Next month, she’s here to stay
Wearing rags and tags is her mystique
She’ll turn her cheek as she pecks your cheek
What’s she looking for?
Well, I guess there’s the door
She winked at me, and she cuddled you
But she’s twice my age, I can’t even buy a brew
Guess I’ll wait and see
I’ll make like a tree?
Her love hexagon’s in seven days
She’ll come your way to turn away
She’s got a client date
Can’t commission late
But I’ll stay to strum and twiddle thumbs
No matter what or not becomes
Of this Hessville hexagon
One day, soon, that shape’s all gone
My lights stay out on Kennedy
As I seek sardonic serenity
To her esoteric smirk
And knee-jerk quirks
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7. |
Sole on Sohl Ave
03:14
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Pained me to see the key in that door
avoid PBJ at that First Choice store
At Nick and George’s, theres salt and there’s pepper
Can’t even bear envelopes holding letters
Cant even punch a nail in the wall
Pitcher and catcher, I’ll bury the ball
I shiver from warmth of fire and wood
Please dear socket, that plug’s up to no good
Block lunar and sol that spin life together
When Eve’s holding Day, I’ll continue to sever
Those lamps remains dark, since I threw out the bulbs
Alas I did split the ceiling and walls
Sayonara to every music and rhyme
And to both of those arms that tell me the time
I guess I’ll grip onto my blood and my heart
And offer you traces till death will I part
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8. |
Carny Arnie
05:26
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Crazy Carny Arnie’s got nothing to lose
He’s got a better chance winning kneeled down at a pew
Waving down his buddies from Hammond senior year
They got wives and kids, he’s selling elephant ears
Brings up memories like they’re breaking news
Same old stories, he’s got the souvenir flu
Cotton candies, tilt-a-whirl, shooting some darts
Snow-cones, photo booths, rinky-dink go karts
He never thought Wolf Lake could take a tole
Looking more battered than a whack a mole
Crazy Carny Arnie’s got nothing to lose
He’s got a better chance winning kneeled down at a pew
He’s not the barker you’d beg to think
Never shouts, but always looks on the brink
For him, most hours tend to be slow
Twiddling his thumbs till the hour glass runs low
But then walks up his old pal with his son
To play shoot the clown with the water gun
He didn’t know better who to shoot
Arnie’s tears ran down like a parachute
Crazy Carny Arnie’s got nothing to lose
He’s got a better chance winning kneeled down at a pew
Crumpled diploma in his glove compartment
That car don’t even got a plate
He takes better care of his naval lint
Never keeps up on sticky noted dates
Crossing Illinois state-line never mean much
Why would you care when you’re out of touch
Puts on a show for red ticketed youths
I guess a man’s best friend‘s a vaudevillian booth
Crazy Carny Arnie’s got nothing to lose
He’s got a better chance winning kneeled down at a pew
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9. |
Peephole
02:55
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Here I am. Staring through the peep
hole once again
Scoping out all my long lost best of friends
Sometimes I daydream that they’re all still around
Guess It’s me and this street light beam since they all left this town
I saw some familiar spirit at the supermarket
As I tried to remind him of our antics on Calumet
But he just shrugged and said he’s here for two more days
I guess I’m the lone cockroach who had the nerve to stay
Here I am. Staring through the peep
hole once again
Scoping out all my long lost best of friends
Sometimes I daydream that they’re all still around
Guess It’s me and this street light beam since they all left this town
Behold that vacant lot, it was our Mecca then
And that hardware shop of ruins, that were I met most my friends
Sometimes I stand here and absorb the silent air
As I pray that these remains will lead me from despair.
Here I am. Staring through the peep
hole once again
Scoping out all my long lost best of friends
Sometimes I daydream that they’re all still around
Guess It’s me and this street light beam since they all left this town
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10. |
When I Get The Chance
03:22
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Woodmar ain’t what it used to be
If you don’t pin it down, they’ll claim it free
Dear Landlord yuppy, comfort me
All my buds and bloods are gone
Only life ‘round here’s a five foot lawn
My sister tells me leave there when you can
When I catch a millisec
If and when I’m not a wreck
Watch me cling to any unwashed hand
Count passing fads like sleeping sleep
Pile vices up till there’s a heap
Pull my sagging pants up when I get the chance
My sister says to move down state
Where the rent’s as high as pearly gates
But I’m locked in park as I try to navigate
For now, I remain the last intwined
To a town that never aged like wine
Go ahead, make Jean Shepherd breathe and stand
When I catch a millisec
If and when I’m not a wreck
Watch me cling to any unwashed hand
Count passing fads like sleeping sleep
Pile vices up till there’s a heap
Pull my sagging pants up when I get the chance
Did you receive my last memo
I stamped and sent it months ago
About how momma’s bedridden in my bungalow
She can barely comprehend a thing
But you’ll just wonder what her estate brings
I guess I’ll call you back when we try to split the land
When I catch a millisec
If and when I’m not a wreck
Watch me cling to any unwashed hand
Count passing fads like sleeping sleep
Pile vices up till there’s a heap
Pull my sagging pants up when I get the chance
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11. |
See You in the Night Al
02:13
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As I hear old chollos hollerin’
Your garage is cracked half-open
You’re just fixing up an engine
But It’s enough to grab attention
Tonight I’ll be your pal
I’ll see you in the night Al
You’re always saying what you think
When you’ve had too much to drink
I’ve heard that story twenty times
But your nostalgia’s so sublime
Tonight I’ll be your pal
I’ll see you in the night Al
Next door neighbor, I’m in need
I’ll be your mouth to feed
The kabobs are on your grill
I’ve learned to cherish your cheap thrills
Tonight I’ll be your pal
I’ll see you in the night Al
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closets Chicago, Illinois
artsy-fartsy, un-easy listening for the new millennium
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